Bless the Broken Road
by Liv Cassidy
Summary: No relationship is perfect, and Olivia and Elliot are no different. Travel with Olivia and Elliot through the broken road of forbidden fruit that leads them straight to their destiny.


_**No relationship is perfect, and Olivia and Elliot's relationship is no different. Travel with Olivia and Elliot through the broken road that leads them straight to their destiny.**_

**AN: This is a little different than anything I've written, so please review and let me know what you think. **

**January 2008**

"When it comes to two-month-old Elliot Stabler, Junior…" The entire precinct was on the edge of their seats during this long, agonizing pause. Olivia's heart raced for her partner. She could see the fear and anticipation on Elliot Stabler's face through the television. Then, the screen faded to black and a commercial started to play.

"It's a conspiracy, I tell you. They always go to the commercials when the show gets to the good part," Munch sighed.

"They've gotta keep you watchin', you know. Kinda like all of the good dramas end on a cliffhanger at the end of the season so the viewers will keep watching next year," Fin said.

"See, I told you it's a conspiracy!" Munch reiterated.

"Hope these commercials speed the hell up. I wanna know if my boy's a single man now," Fin said.

"Why? You've been closeted this whole time and didn't tell me? And I'm your partner!" Munch said with a grunt.

"That's not what I meant. Wait…" Fin raised an eyebrow. "Would you date me?"

"Not a chance, even if I were gay."

Olivia's thoughts were far away from Munch and Fin's conversation. She was thinking about Elliot, and what this result could mean. Olivia knew that Elliot had doubted his youngest son's paternity from the moment he'd learned Kathy was pregnant. He and Kathy had been separated for two years, so she knew it wasn't unlikely. She found herself biting her nails nervously. _Please say he's not the father, _Olivia thought. _Shit, Olivia, you're a horrible person. Why the fuck would you even think that? _She couldn't believe she was hoping Elliot's son wasn't his. She knew that she was going to Hell. The vivid, sodomizing images of her partner that filled her fantasies would certainly result in a one-way ticket to Hell.

She wanted to run her hands all over his body, feel his erection against her body, and rip his clothes off him. She wanted to fear his warm lips press against hers, she wanted to suck lightly on his neck, and work her mouth down his body; and that was just the beginning. Her partner's body was the subject of her everyday thoughts, and no matter how hard she tried to distract herself, she couldn't. The worst part was Kathy and Elliot had been separated for two years, and she hadn't even made an effort to take advantage of it. Then again, he hadn't passed a move at her either. What was she supposed to do? They were partners, and any romantic interaction between the two would mean they couldn't be partners anymore. That was the reason she'd requested a different partner last year. That was the reason she'd been so quick to accept an opportunity to go undercover out of time. She had to get away from him, but she couldn't stop thinking about him. He'd managed to control her dreams from thousands of miles away. He was the subject of her every thought, and everything she did and saw reminded her of him. _Please, for God's sake, say he's not the father, _Olivia, catching Munch from the corner of the eye.

"Liv, you there? You look like you're a million miles away," Munch observed, and he was right. Her thoughts were a million miles away from the precinct.

"She's probably fantasizing about the wild sex she and Elliot are gonna have when the results come back saying Elliot isn't the father!" Fin said with a grin on his face.

"Shut up, Fin! Am not," Olivia rolled her eyes, lightly slapping Fin on the shoulder.

Fin and Munch looked at each other, raising their eyebrows.

"I don't know, I still think he's the father," Munch said, just as the cameras flew back to Dr. Phil, Elliot, and Kathy. "Well, we're about to find out…"

A blond haired, blue-eyed baby boy's picture was on the screen behind them. Elliot's face was red, and Olivia's heart ached for him. She couldn't imagine being in his situation, about to find out if his son was really his son. He'd changed the baby's diapers. He'd been there since he was born. He'd cradled him as he cried. It was about time he found out the truth.

"You ARE the father!"

Olivia's heart fell into her gut.

"SEE! I fucking told you!" Kathy was spitting at Elliot. "Unlike you, I don't BLEEPing sleep with everyone who offers! You're the unfaithful bastard! I TOLD YOU THAT HE'S YOURS!" Tears were streaming from Kathy's eyes as she hollered at Elliot. "Why the BLEEP didn't you believe me without us having to go on this BLEEPing show? You had no BLEEPing faith in me!"

"I'm sorry!" Elliot hollered back. "And I don't BLEEPing sleep with everyone who offers."

"Oh, don't think I'm BLEEPing stupid. I know about you and your partner! I'm not blind!"

Olivia's stomach ached as Kathy referenced her, knowing what Kathy was saying wasn't true. _It's all drama, _she knew. She'd seen Maury on multiple occasions and the people always were bizarre and unreasonable, regardless to the result. She figured it must be in the contract that you had to act hysterical. She couldn't watch anymore. She turned away, walking over to her desk.

Fin followed after her and placed his hand on her shoulder.

"Liv, you okay? Look, I was just kidding earlier," Fin said softly.

"Yeah, I know, Fin. You're fine," Olivia said, returning to her DD5s.

Two days later, Elliot returned to work. He was quieter than usual, and Munch even knew not to mention the Maury Show to him. When he and Olivia were in the car alone on the way to a case he whispered, "I'm sorry, Liv."

"Huh?" she asked. "What about?"

He raised a brow. "The show…you saw it, didn't you?"

"What show?"

And they'd left it at that for some time.

**November 2008**

"Are you ready for me, Daddy? Ooooh, didn't know we were having a party. That's gonna be $100 to join, $250 to join."

_Oh, God. _What the fuck was she doing? Her hands traced over his strong, buff shoulders. This moment had haunted her dreams for years, and she didn't want to let go. His skin released a fiery sensation that warmed her unclothed body. She couldn't believe she was doing this. _You're only doing it to save his life, _she told herself, but she knew was only lying to herself. She was using it as an excuse to get intimately close to her partner who she was madly and insanely infatuated with.

She had come to tell him that he needed to call Kathy because she was having a hissy fit about not being able to contact him. That was Kathy's MO, though. You'd think after being married to a police officer for so many years, she'd get used to Elliot being undercover. You'd think she knew that undercover meant he wasn't reachable. It seemed as if Kathy had become obsessed with knowing Elliot's every move, and she was getting worse. Olivia suspected she wanted to know if Elliot and Olivia were busy banging somewhere. _If we ever did fuck, that'd be the perfect reason to tell her Elliot was unavailable, though, _Olivia thought. _Damn, you're so evil, Olivia. _

Days and weeks after the case ended, Olivia could still feel Elliot's warm skin against hers. She couldn't look at him the same way.

**February 2009**

"Shouldn't you go home and be with Kathy and the kids?" Olivia responded to Elliot's request to go catch a drink as they were rounding up their things. It had been a difficult case for the unit. A transgendered girl's father was attacked by her school guidance counselor. The case had been heart-breaking for Olivia as she'd gotten to know Hailey and the struggles she'd endured. Her father couldn't accept his son as a daughter. It's something Olivia had never thought about. While she'd thought about having kids a lot, she'd never imagined what she'd do if she found out her son wanted to be girl or vice versa.

"It's been a long-ass week, and if I want to wind down with a beer, then I will. Kathy and the kids can wait," Elliot insisted.

"You sure you want me to go with you? Last thing I want is…"

"I don't care if you come or not. I'm going to the bar either way," Elliot barked. Olivia saw the dark circles under his eyes. He needed to wind down before heading home.

"Yeah, you better catch a few drinks before going home to Kathy with that attitude," Olivia smirked. "Let's go, then."

She couldn't help but notice Elliot staring at her as she sipped her wine.

"What?" she asked.

"I was just thinking…" he trailed.

"About?"

"Remember that time I was undercover and you posed as my prostitute?" Olivia felt her cheeks redden. "Well, I never thanked you for that." Her eyes widened. "I mean…you saved my life." He finished his beer and motioned for the bartender to bring him another one.

"That's what partners are for, though you wouldn't have been in trouble if I hadn't showed up in the first place…"

"Hey, I'm not complaining," Elliot said. "You know, you have soft hands."

"Huh?"

He reached out and grabbed her hand, and she didn't pull away. His hand was warm and alluring. Her veins throbbed as her pulse quickened. He moved his hand up her wrist and smiled. "You've got a fast pulse, too."

"Since when are you so observant, Elliot?" she said, laughing teasingly. "How are Kathy and the kids?"

Elliot sighed. "Let's not talk about that." He gulped down his next beer. Olivia had barely finished half her glass of wine. Though, she'd known all along that Elliot could out drink her. She'd never been much of a drinker, anyway. Her mother had been a drunk, and she'd vowed to herself that she would never turn into her mother.

"What do you mean let's not talk about that?" Olivia asked. "Look, I hate to pry, but is everything okay at home, Elliot?"

He was silent for a moment, and then sighed. "No, Liv, they aren't. Every time I go home I'm the subject of a hundred questions. I can't take it anymore. Kathy has no faith in me, and I'm fed up. Sometimes…I wish…"

"You wish what?"

"God, I know this is horrible, and I love him to death, but sometimes I wish that the results had come back negative," Elliot said, his face fell into his hands as he tugged at his skull. "Fuck, Liv, I'm going to Hell."

_That makes two of us, then, _she thought. She didn't know how to respond.

"I can't go home, Olivia. I just can't face her anymore," Elliot whispered.

"Y-You could stay at my place." She couldn't believe she was offering. She knew she was opening a can of worms right then and there.

"Nah, I don't want to be a bother to you," Elliot insisted. "I'm sorry for pestering you with my personal life."

"El, you're not pestering me. Trust me. And you wouldn't be a bother."

She looked into his bright blue eyes, and that was the moment that changed the status of their relationship forever.

**November 2009**

"Ever slept with your partner, Detective?" Dickie Stabler sneered. Olivia's eyes widened as she looked at the one-way glass where she knew Elliot would be standing, watching her interrogate his son. She felt sick. Had Kathy put him up to this? Then again, Dickie had probably grown up listening to his mother complain about Olivia. He'd probably heard her accusations for years, long before they were true.

"Never," was Olivia's flat response. She wished she could see Elliot's face right now, because only they were the only ones who knew the truth. Nine months had passed since the partners had become fuck buddies. That was nine months of the best sex of Olivia's life. They always did it in her apartment, because they knew that was the one place they'd never get caught. They'd done it everywhere in her apartment: in her bed; on the floor; in the shower; on the couch; and even on the kitchen table. His aroma lurked throughout the apartment, even when it had been days since they'd fucked. She woke every morning to the smell of Elliot Stabler, and she loved it. She knew it was so wrong, but it felt so good.

She and Elliot went to her apartment later that evening. Olivia was drowned in her thoughts as she admired Elliot's sexy stature. She wanted to dig her hands into his skin and ride him right then and there. Her stomach tightened, yearning for his body. She found herself thinking back to Dickie's question and the lie she'd told. She felt so bad.

"El," she whispered, as Elliot reached out and wrapped his arms around her, kissing her lips. She pulled away. "El, we can't do this anymore. I can't."

"What do you mean, Liv? You mean because of what Dickie said earlier? He's just a kid. He doesn't know shit. Kathy's been putting these ideas in his head since he was a kid. Liv…"

"Elliot, stop," Olivia said, pushing herself out of his arms. "For ten years, your wife was crazy. But now she's right, and God, lying to Dickie today…I can't do this anymore. El, I think one of us should transfer units. You're married and you have kids. You've got to be with your wife. This isn't right." She crossed her arms and began to cry. For years she'd fantasized about being with Elliot. She'd known it was wrong all along. Partners couldn't be lovers too. If IAB found out about their relationship, with or without Kathy, they couldn't be partners anymore.

"Well, you're right about one thing," Elliot admitted. "If we're going to come clean, then one of us will have to transfer…"

"I'm not saying we should come clean. I'm saying we should stop what we're doing. I was the stupid one who invited you over here that night. I'm so fucking stupid. What was I thinking? You and I…can't be."

Elliot reached for her again and wrapped his arms around her. She started to weep into his shoulder. He rubbed his hand gently against her back. He was so strong. So powerful. How could he handle this?

"Liv, I haven't had sex with Kathy in almost a year," he said. "The chemistry I share with you…I could never have with her. I've never experienced what you and I have with anyone else. I want us to work…I…"

"El, stop! I've already lied to Dickie, and in front of Cragen! We can't. We can't do this anymore. Leave, Elliot!" she pushed him away with all her strength. "Leave!" She yelled.

He reached out and grabbed her wrist. "Liv, you're the only stable thing I have left in my fucked up life. I can't imagine my life without you!"

"Elliot, fucking let go of me!" she demanded, digging her hands through his grip. She knew that he didn't mean to hurt her. Her wrist throbbed, and she saw Elliot's handprint around her wrist.

"Oh, shit, Olivia. I'm sorry!" he cried.

"It's…whatever," Olivia said and whispered, "You really should go."

And he did.

She'd intended to request to transfer, but she didn't. Months passed, and she continued to work side-by-side with Elliot as if nothing had ever happened. She knew that Elliot always bottled his feelings up inside.

**January 2011**

"I left her," Elliot said. It was random when they were standing at their lockers.

"What?" Olivia didn't know how to react.

"I left Kathy," Elliot said in a very specific, matter-of-fact tone. "The divorce is final."

"What? Why?" Olivia asked quietly, trying not to make a scene. It had been over a year since they'd stopped seeing each other. Why had it taken him so long? Did Kathy know about their relationship? Somehow Olivia doubted it.

"You know why," Elliot said, just before Fin walked over.

Fin and Melinda were the first to find out. It happened a week after Elliot had told her that he'd left Kathy. Elliot had invited her out for a drink after work. How were they supposed to know that Fin and Melinda would be out on a date? She didn't even know Fin and Melinda were an item. Of course, Elliot had had his paws all over Olivia's backside. Fin then went onto insist he'd known all along.

And Fin never let them live it down from then on.

"I actually watch her back and not her backside," Fin began teasing Elliot on a regular basis. He and Melinda had both promised not to tell anyone else, because otherwise they couldn't stay partners.

**May 2011**

"Olivia, I don't want to be with anyone but you," Elliot told her, lying next to her in her bed. Elliot had begun spending more and more time at her apartment. They'd even discussed him moving in, but that meant they would have to clean. That was a regular topic of discussion too.

"You have no idea how many years I've waited for you to say those words," she said with a soft whisper, kissing his lips. "I love you, Elliot Stabler."

"I love you, too, baby. You know what I want?" he asked.

"What's that?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I want to give you a baby," he replied so simply. "I know we've been very precautious so far, because we didn't want to take the chances of you getting pregnant then everyone finding out I'm the father. But, Liv, I don't care anymore. You're not getting any younger, and if anyone deserves a child, it's you."

Her heart quickened. She didn't know what to say to that. She knew she wasn't getting younger, and she knew she'd dreamt of having a baby, specifically Elliot's baby, for years. This couldn't be happening. But what about their jobs? Their partnerships? Olivia couldn't imagine herself with another partner.

"Liv, before you go into the 'we can't be partners' spiel, don't. You don't have to leave SVU. I will. I know you love that unit, and I would never ask you to change your job for me. Besides, it's time. I've been at SVU longer than anyone else there."

"But, El," she said softly. "You ARE the reason I love my job. I can't imagine working with anyone else. I can't…" she gulped, "…imagine having another partner."

"You have me right here, Olivia," he said softy, gently rubbing her shoulder. "You have me in more ways than that. You'll do just fine. You're an amazing detective and SVU needs you. I'm just seen as a detective with anger management problems. SVU will survive just fine without me, but it would struggle like heck without you. You're the whole unit."

Olivia didn't want to believe what he was saying, but two weeks later, after he shot a teenaged girl who was the same age as his youngest daughter, reality began to set in. Elliot took time off work, and he refused to talk about the case. Olivia asked him if he would return, but he refused to talk about it. Then, one day, Cragen pulled her into his office to tell her that Elliot put in his papers. Olivia was pissed. The man who shared her bed hadn't told her that he'd officially put in his papers. She knew she shouldn't be surprised, but she couldn't help from crying. Elliot was right, though. It's not like she was losing him. She still had him. Just not at work.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Elliot!" she yelled, pounding on his apartment door. He was shirtless when he opened the door, and her eyes instantly landed on his tattoo; which rested on his muscular arm. "Why didn't you tell me first, El? Why did I have to hear this from CRAGEN?"

"I just put them in a couple hours ago. Cragen already told you?" he acted as if he'd done nothing wrong.

"You could have told me," she whispered.

"It's not like you didn't know it was coming," Elliot pointed out, and she knew he was correct. "I have something for you." Her eyes widened as he motioned her inside and closed the door. He walked into his bedroom and soon walked out with a small box in his hand. _No, _she thought, as he opened the box and she spotted the glimmering piece of jewelry. He kneeled down on one knee and looked into her big brown eyes. "I'm a little out of practice at this, so you'll have to forgive me if I do something wrong. Olivia Benson, I'm madly in love with you, and I want you to be the last woman I share my life with. Will you marry me?"

**May 2012**

They'd been married for a month. Kathy had taken it hard when she first found out about the wedding. Her first reaction had been to throw in their faces that she'd known all along that they were banging and refused to believe their relationship was more recent. Dickie had taken it the second hardest, frustrated that Olivia had lied straight to his face. Dickie still wasn't talking to his dad or Olivia. The girls had all accepted that their parents were no longer in love and their dad was happy with Olivia. Olivia had always been closest with Kathleen. Kathleen had been the first to give them her blessing. Eli was too young to understand what was going on.

Everyone at SVU, including the newbies, knew about her and Elliot's relationship. Fin was quick to boast that he'd been the first to know. Munch suggested it was obvious. Cragen didn't seem surprised either. Amanda and Nick didn't know Elliot well, though it appeared Munch and Fin had told them plenty of stories. In some ways, Nick reminded Olivia of a young Elliot, which could be why their personalities clashed. After Nick and Olivia started partnering up frequently, Elliot had insisted they invite him over for dinner. At that dinner, Elliot had threatened to mangle Nick's insides if he didn't protect Olivia. Olivia suddenly felt like a teenaged girl.

"So, what's this I hear Nick and his wife are having problems?" Elliot asked, looking over the newspaper.

"Huh?" Olivia asked, wondering how Elliot could possibly have heard about the spiel that had happened in the precinct the other day.

"Oh, I ran into Fin and he mentioned Nick's wife causing havoc in the precinct. What was that about?"

"I really don't know the specifics, El. I try not to pry into my partner's life…"

"Did you forget who you're talking to?" Elliot raised an eyebrow, taking a sip of his coffee.

"No, but I heard back from the adoption agency today," Olivia said, changing the topic. They had been trying to conceive for a year now with no luck. Olivia knew that she was getting older, which meant her chances of getting pregnant were slim to none. She loved spending time with Eli, who stayed with her and Elliot every other weekend. She'd come to accept she may never have a biological child, so Elliot had suggested she apply for adoption; it may be her best bet at having a child. When she was single, she didn't qualify, but now she had Elliot to help support her and the child. Of course the child would be his too.

"And?"

"They want to meet with us tomorrow at three. Oh, El, I have a good feeling about this." She grinned; the thought of finally becoming a mother couldn't make her more happier, though he didn't smile back. "What's wrong, Elliot? You're the one who suggested we look into adoption."

"Yeah, that's great. There's just something else Fin mentioned."

"What?"

"Why didn't you tell me that you interrogated Brian Cassidy yesterday?"


End file.
